A study by the New England Journal of Medicine found that the virus can live on surfaces and in the air between a few hours to several days. It can remain viable in the air for up to 3 hours, on cardboard up to 24 hours, and on plastic and stainless steel for to 72 hours. Some good news according to John Hopkins University: the COVID-19 virus is fragile, with a thin layer of fat its only protection. Soap or detergent is the best offense, as it dissolves the fat layer and thus the protein molecule of the virus disperses and collapses. 

We’re all being mindful of handwashing, social distancing, and wearing a mask in public to minimize exposure, as per recommendations by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The fourth leg of the stool for preventative measures is keeping the home safe. According to the CDC, a clean household is another way to help keep COVID-19 at bay. A regular cleaning routine makes for an impactful weapon in the coronavirus fight. Here are some suggestions on how to keep your home clean and safe:

First things first: Clean or Disinfect?

The CDC suggests cleaning before disinfecting, because while cleaning removes dirt and other impurities it doesn’t necessarily kill germs. Disinfecting takes place when chemicals are used to kill germs on surfaces, thus lowering the risk of spreading a virus. The good news is that soap and water is all you need to remove up to 97% of germs. When you wash surfaces with soap and water, you’ll break up the dirt and oil that protects germs. A swipe isn’t enough; you need to use good old-fashioned elbow grease to physically wipe away grime. 

To disinfect, soak the surface with disinfectant for about 10 minutes before wiping down. Of course, make sure to wear gloves! Given that disposable gloves might be in short supply, it’s fine to use reusable gloves as long as they’re dedicated for cleaning and disinfecting. 

What are the best disinfectants for COVID-19?

You can use these most common EPA-registered household disinfectants: alcohol, bleach, hydrogen peroxide, and quaternary ammonium compounds. According to the CDC, the most effective among these are diluted household bleach solutions and alcohol solutions with at least 70% alcohol. Follow product label instructions and make sure you have good ventilation.  

To create a diluted bleach solution as a disinfectant, the CDC recommends four teaspoons of bleach per quart of water (or one-third of a cup of bleach per gallon of water). Never combine bleach with ammonia or other cleaning solutions, as you could produce a hazardous gas! Here is your NEVER EVER MIX LIST: 1) bleach and vinegar, 2) bleach and ammonia, 3) bleach and rubbing alcohol, and 4) hydrogen peroxide and vinegar. 

Try using color-coded cleaning cloths to prevent cross-contamination between rooms. Washcloths, rags and clothes (on the hot water setting) right after cleaning to prevent contamination of floors or clothing hampers and let them dry completely. 

What about cleaning soft surfaces? 

Remove visible dirt from rugs, carpeting, and rugs and use appropriate cleaners for these surfaces to clean and disinfect them. Avoid shaking dirty clothing, sheets or cloth to cut down the risk of dispersing the virus through the air. Use a disposable bag liner in the clothes hamper.  

How frequently should you clean your home?  

The CDC recommends cleaning and disinfecting frequently touched surfaces daily, including light switches, doorknobs, handles, countertops, tables, desks, phones, faucets, remote controls, hard-backed chairs, computers, and keyboards. Of course, the list includes mobility and medical equipment commonly used by the elderly and the disabled such as walkers, canes, and handrails. 

Infectious disease expert Dr. Anthony Fauci promoted calm during an interview with “The Daily Show” host Trevor Noah. “You don’t want to be obsessive-compulsive about wiping everything down that you go near,” Fauci said. Still, the CDC recommendations daily cleaning tasks include sweeping and lightly mopping the kitchen floor, dishwashing and sanitizing kitchen sponges (either in the dishwasher or a minute in the microwave). Mirrors, waste bins, hard-surface floors, toilets, and sinks should be cleaned and disinfected weekly. 

What doesn’t work for cleaning and disinfecting? 

Many people clean with vinegar because it’s inexpensive and natural. However, there’s no evidence that it is effective against coronavirus. Also, it’s a myth that vodka or other distilled spirits are sanitizing agents. The concentration of alcohol in vodka is not high enough to kill viruses. In fact, Tito’s Handmade Vodka issued a public warning that at 40% alcohol, its vodka “does not meet the current recommendation of the CDC” for at least 60% alcohol in hand sanitizer. 

Keep in mind that there is no treatment or cure for COVID-19, so be leery of people trying to sell you a product with that promise. The Food and Drug Administration and the Federal Trade Commission has been sending warning letters to companies for selling bogus products and unapproved drugs that pose significant risks. Don’t be fooled by recipes for homemade hand sanitizers or cleaning solutions using vodka or vinegar that you might see on the internet or social media, as these are all ineffective. Also, baby wipes do not kill coronavirus. 

What else should I know to keep a safe home? 

When someone in the home has a suspected or confirmed case of COVID-19, you’ll need to change your cleaning methods. Click here for the CDC’s recommendations. 

With increased handwashing and sanitizing comes with increased skin dryness. You want to avoid cracks developing in your skin from extreme dryness, as these cracks will give germs an entryway into your body. Make sure to moisturize frequently with products that contain ceramides (oils), dimethicone (a variety of silicone), and/or shea butter. 

Let’s face it – cleaning the entire home for COVID-19 safety will seem overwhelming, particularly for older Americans with mobility issues or health conditions. If that’s the case, reach out to family members or a close friend for assistance. Or if you need an extra helping hand to tackle housecleaning or other everyday chores, consider reaching out to SYNERGY HomeCare of Villa Rica to learn about how an in-home caregiver can help you maintain a clean home and minimize your exposure to viruses. We are here to help, so if you have any questions on in-home care and preventative measures, please contact 770-881-8509.

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Family Caregivers: Finding the Courage to Ask for Help When You Need It

Many words can be used to describe the role of a family caregiver, but “easy” is not one of them. Caregiving is demanding and stressful, yet if done right, it can be incredibly rewarding. Unfortunately, many family caregivers neglect to recognize their personal limitations and they set unrealistic goals about the amount of care they can provide. Having impractical expectations in combination with an unhealthy attitude towards the acceptance of help is the quickest way to end up chronically stressed and on the road to caregiver burnout. When you notice your role as a family caregiver is affecting your quality of life, it’s important to take a step back and recognize you need help. Asking for help when you need it is not about giving up or passing the burden to someone else, nor is it an indicator of how much you care. Finding the courage to ask for help is about understanding how the quality of care you provide for someone else is directly impacted by the care you provide for yourself.

The Truth About Asking For Help

Family caregivers, also referred to as “informal” caregivers, are people who are responsible for attending to the needs of a family member, life partner, or friend. They provide physical, emotional, and sometimes even financial support to the loved one who is unable to care for him or herself due to illness, injury, or disability. Family caregivers usually provide this care without pay.

The reality for many family caregivers is they were unaware of how demanding the job would be. For some, the caregiving role happened abruptly, leaving little time to prepare. And although others saw it coming, they underestimated the amount of work that would be required of them. Regardless of whether becoming a caregiver was foreseeable, it is nearly impossible to do alone. This is especially true for loved ones who require ’round the clock care. Even when you are caring for someone who doesn’t require extensive care, the job is difficult. It is impossible to effectively care for another person without taking the time to properly care for yourself. In order to do so, you will need to ask for assistance and know it’s okay to seek out and ask for help when you need it.

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There is a common misconception around the idea of asking for help. Many caregivers are reticent to ask for assistance because they view it as a sign of weakness or inadequacy. That idea could not be further from the truth. Asking for help demonstrates not only the acceptance of one’s own limitations, but it also brings to light the possession of admirable traits – including the following:

Honesty 

Asking for help demonstrates the ability, to be honest with both yourself and the person you are caring for. This honesty helps sustain and can possibly even improve your relationship.

Responsibility

Taking the time to figure out how much you can take on and what jobs are better left to the professionals requires a great deal of responsibility. As a family caregiver, the quality of another person’s life is in your hands. It is your responsibility to ensure your loved one gets care suited to their needs.

Humble

Accepting help shows the ability to remain humble. Family caregivers need breaks just like anyone else.

Courage

Having the courage to ask for help when you need it indicates you are willing to do what is right regardless of your personal feelings.

Many times, family caregivers refuse help or fail to seek out help because they possess an unfavorable attitude towards help, especially paid help. Because of their strong “family takes care of family” mentality, they refuse to recognize outside help as an option. That may have been acceptable when women were defined by society as caretakers, but times have changed and it is usually unrealistic to have someone provide 24/7 care.

When to Ask For Help

It’s important to know when to ask for help. The best time to reach out is before you feel too stressed, a feeling known as caregiver stress. If you are new to being a family caregiver, you may not be able to realize when you are approaching this point, but as time goes on you will be able to tell when you are reaching your limit. If you miss it, the second-best time to reach out for help is as soon as you start experiencing the symptoms associated with caregiver stress.

10 common symptoms of caregiver stress indicating it may be time to call for backup include:

• Depression
• Withdrawl
• Insomnia
• Trouble concentrating
• Anger
• Health issues
• Exhaustion
• Anxiety
• Drinking or smoking
• Altered Eating habits

Failing to reach out can result in something referred to as caregiver burnout. Caregiver Burnout is a state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion. Some caregivers even suffer from a change in attitude and they become hostile and resentful.

Common signs of caregiver burnout include

• Having significantly less energy than you had prior to taking on your care role
• Getting sick more frequently
• Feeling constantly exhausted, even after you take a break or sleep
• Neglecting your own needs for various reasons including guilt and time constraints
• Putting your care role in the center of your world
• Having trouble relaxing, even when help is available
• Becoming increasingly impatient and irritable with the person you are caring for.
• Feeling helpless and hopeless

Who to Ask For Help

Before you ask for help, it is crucial to determine what exactly you need help with. There are many caregiving activities you should consider including homemaker (i.e. household maintenance and repairs, running errands, etc.), personal care (i.e. bathing, dressing, etc.), and quality of life (i.e. companionship, social advocacy, etc.).

Once you establish what you need help with, create a list of resources and people who can help you. This list will vary from person to person because it is dependent on many factors including the level of care your loved one needs. A few to consider include:

Friends and family. If possible, add friends and family to your list. Get together and establish what help they will be able to provide. Make sure to discuss financial help as well as physical and emotional support.

Neighbors. Neighbors can be an excellent source to turn to. Your loved one likely knows your neighbors and will likely feel more comfortable with a familiar face checking in on them. Even just asking them to stop by their home every once in a while can help you by giving you peace of mind.

Home care services. Home care is one of the most flexible options to find help. Home Care agencies such as SYNERGY HomeCare are able to accommodate clients based on their personal needs.

Local support group. A local support group allows you to communicate with people having similar issues. You can not only learn a lot from and their experiences, but you can take comfort in knowing you are not alone.

Online forums. Online forums allow you to easily connect with people from a distance. By visiting an online forum, you can find guidance at your convenience.

There is an abundance of online resources available to help you. You can find an extensive list on the Family Caregiver Alliance Website. 

Failing to ask for help becomes self-destructive when you can no longer provide a positive contribution to your loved one’s life. Regardless of your good intentions, your ability to provide quality care diminishes when you become chronically stressed. Do yourself and your loved one a favor by finding the courage to ask for help when you need it.

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What is Alzheimer’s Disease?

Alzheimer’s disease is the most common form of dementia, a general term for cognitive decline and memory loss. It affects memory, thinking, and behavior. While the progressive cognitive decline is devastating, the most upsetting part of Alzheimer’s is it is currently irreversible.

• Alzheimer’s is the 6th leading cause of death in the United States.
• Those diagnosed with Alzheimer’s live an average of 8 years after symptoms have become noticeable.
• Changes in the brain related to Alzheimer’s begin years before there are any signs of the disease.
• Those with Alzheimer’s still experience joy and happiness, despite their increased confused state.

Caring Through the Stages of Alzheimer’s Disease

The intellectual impairment progresses gradually from occasional forgetfulness to complete disability. At first, the person may seem a little forgetful. Then, they may have more difficulty learning new skills or even speaking. As the disease advances, the job becomes more and more demanding.

With that being said, it’s important to remember even though Alzheimer’s disease can’t be stopped, there is a lot you can do to improve the overall quality of life of both you and the person suffering. By understanding how Alzheimer’s advances, you will be able to adapt and prepare for inevitable.

Mid-Alzheimer’s disease (early-stage)
The early-stage of Alzheimer’s is referred to as mid-Alzheimer’s disease or early-stage. This stage is the most difficult to recognize. Failing to remember appointments and conversations have just happened in as little as a few hours ago can be a red flag.

If your loved one has just been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease, one of the most important things you can do for them is to get informed. The more you know about the disease, the more you will be able to understand what they are going through. When you have a better comprehension of the disease, you will able to manage their care better. You will be able to see why they are acting the way they are and will be more likely to cope with the enhanced level of patience your new role requires of you.

During this early stage, you should focus on maximizing their independence. You can accomplish this by supporting them in their decisions, providing the necessary companionship, and helping them prepare for their future. Taking the initiative to learn and prepare will help you overcome if not avoid many of the potential obstacles this diagnosis comes with.

For example, knowing a common side-effect of Alzheimer’s is aggression can go a long way. If your loved one becomes aggressive for seemingly no reason, you will be able to internalize it better. You will know it’s part of the disease, and you won’t take it personally. Knowing why something is happening can only benefit you and your loved one.

Moderate Alzheimer’s Disease (middle-stage)
The middle-stage is called Moderate Alzheimer’s disease. It is the longest stage and also requires the most flexibility on your end as a caregiver. You will likely notice your loved one has more difficulty with words and they may get frustrated more easily. They may also refuse to do tasks they find unappealing. This includes tasks such as bathing, which often becomes more of an ordeal as the disease progresses.

The care you provide is going to more demanding and require lots of patience. Give your loved one as much structure as possible and be prepared to adjust the parts of the routine that are not working.

Severe Alzheimer’s Disease (late-stage)
The final stage of Alzheimer’s disease is no doubt the most challenging. During this stage, your loved one may have difficulty doing basic tasks such as eating and swallowing. They will need around the clock care and you will likely need help. 

During this stage, you should take extra precautions to ensure your loved one is not in pain because they may have difficulty communicating it with you.

Much of your loved ones life is experienced through senses, meaning touch, sound, taste, sight, and smell. For this reason, you can care for them by directly targeting these senses. For example, you can read to them, play music for them, and make them their favorite foods.

But most importantly, the care you provide should focus on preserving their quality of life and dignity.

Communicating with someone who has Alzheimer Disease

• Don’t talk about them when they can hear you
• Talk to them NOT at them
• Communicate with them calmly
• Avoid arguing or trying to convince them of something
• Refrain from communicating when either of you is tired

Remembering to Care for Yourself

Remembering to care for yourself is one of the things caregivers often need to be reminded of. It is easy to get caught up in all the responsibilities you have while caring for someone with Alzheimer’s Disease, but if you are not well taken care of, you will not be able to provide the care your loved one deserves. When this happens it may cause you to feel as though you are falling short – creating more stress than you already have. Stress can cause you to do and behave in ways you normally would have. It even causes you to take out your frustration on the person you are caring for – which will only worsen the problem. Never neglect to take time off and accept help when you need it.

Knowing if Someone Has Alzheimer’s Disease

There are 10 signs of Alzheimer’s disease provided by The Alzheimer’s Association.

1. Memory loss that disrupts daily life
2. Challenges in planning and/or problem-solving
3. Difficulty completing everyday tasks
4. Confusing times and/or places
5. Trouble understanding images and spatial relationships
6. Problems with words when speaking and writing
7. Misplacing things
8. Decreased/ poor judgment
9. Withdrawl from work and/or social activities
10. Changes in mood and/or personality

Severe memory loss is never a normal part of aging. If you notice any of these signs in yourself or a loved one, be sure to seek medical advice.

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Jo Huey, an Alzheimer’s caregiver for over 30 years, has created what she calls “The 10 Absolutes of Alzheimer’s Caregiving.” She shares more stories of her experiences in her book “Alzheimer’s Disease: Help and Hope.”  The 10 Absolutes provide practical yet compassionate strategies for family caregivers to implement that are based on her personal experience. We hope you find some of these helpful.

1. Never argue, instead agree.

2. Never reason, instead divert.

3. Never shame, instead distract.

4. Never say “you can’t,” instead say “do what you can.”

5. Never command or demand, instead ask or model.

6. Never condescend, instead encourage and praise.

7. Never say “remember,” instead reminisce.

8. Never say “I told you,” instead repeat.

9. Never lecture, instead reassure.

10. Never force, instead reinforce.

In a nutshell; be understanding, attuned, and constantly aware of your loved one’s condition. It may be difficult to remember at times, but their mentally deteriorated state is not really “them,” and their misconceptions due to their condition are not their fault.

Though more difficult in practice than in theory, when caregiving for Alzheimer’s patients – it always helps to remember the golden rule.

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Stay hydrated. It is recommended that everyone drink 8 glasses of water each day, but especially those over 65. “Elderly individuals have a harder time knowing when they are dehydrated,” said Dr. Ronan Factora of the Cleveland Clinic. “As a result, they are more prone to heat stroke.” Seniors also lose the ability to conserve water as they age. Avoid drinks containing caffeine and alcohol, as they will further dehydrate you. If you are outside or exercising, be sure to drink sweat replacement drinks to replace the extra water you lost.

Dress appropriately. Loose-fitting and light-colored clothes will keep you cool and not absorb as much heat from the sun. It’s best to wear breathable fabrics, such as cotton, to help regulate your temperature.  A broad hat and sunglasses will keep the sun’s rays out of your face and eyes.

Wear sunscreen. This is especially pertinent for seniors, as many prescription medications make your skin more sensitive to the sun. Applying a broad-spectrum sunscreen with an SPF of 15 or higher will help you avoid sunburn.

Stay out of the sun. Check the forecast and avoid prolonged time in the sun, especially on days where the temperature reaches above 90 degrees. Try to plan any outside activities for the early morning or in twilight hours after sunset.

Spend time in air-conditioned places. If you want to get out of the house while avoiding the heat (or if your house isn’t air-conditioned), look for activities in spots with AC. Go see a movie with the grandkids, or read a book at the library. A walk around the mall or a class at your local senior center are a great way to get exercise indoors.

Know when to cool down. If you’re feeling heated, take a tepid (not too hot or cold) bath or shower to cool down. You can also use cool washcloths on the neck, wrist, and armpits. Seniors are at a higher risk of heat-related illness due to health factors they are susceptible to such as poor circulation, heart disease, high blood pressure, and the inability to perspire due to certain medications. The following are health problems by heat and their warning signs:

If you or a loved one experiences any of the symptoms above, move to a cool and shady place. If they are awake, try to get them to drink plenty of water/ and or sports drinks to replace electrolytes. In the case of heatstroke or heat exhaustion, seek medical attention immediately, especially if you have blood pressure or heart problems.

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This Father’s Day, we celebrate the men in our lives who raised us, provided for us and helped mold us into the people we are today. A great dad can be a family leader and hero in their children’s eyes. But if you are a family member providing long-term care for your father, you might need to be reminded that you are a hero too.

Family members may be the most immediate option for providing or managing long-term care. They are intimately connected to the seniors they love. They know details about their health, character, preferences, finances and future plans. But family members are rarely able to accurately assess the emotional costs of family caregiving on their relationships. Caring roles reverse when children become caregivers for their parents, or when spouses care for each other. This may be the most comfortable arrangement for you, but it’s common for seniors to feel like something is wrong when a family member is responsible for needs they used to completely take care of independently.

With the men who took care of business and caught us when we’d fall, it can be especially hard to switch around the roles. Daughters and wives are frequently the go-to family caregivers for senior fathers. After lifetimes of depending on Dad, these women might find their worlds turned upside down when Dad becomes dependent on them. Nevertheless, daughters who are dedicated to their fathers can easily become “women in the middle” who juggle multiple roles. Daughter caregivers are frequently mothers, wives, and employees while providing care for their aging parents. Each role can place impossible demands on them that compete for their time and energy. If you are a daughter caregiver for a father you love, understand that this is a hard job and that it puts you in a uniquely difficult place from the standpoint of mental, emotional and physical stress.

The objective of good senior caregiving is to enrich aging loved one’s life and encourage independent living to the extent that it is possible. A big part of this is maintaining the dignity of seniors who receive care. At the same time, a daughter providing care must take care of herself. Even though daughters may be most familiar available to care for their parents, the very fact that they are family might make father’s feel it compromises their dignity, and for certain caregiving duties, it may even feel humiliating to them. As a caregiver, daughters may also feel parts of their dignity are being sacrificed when moving into that caregiving role.

In contemplation of this Father’s Day, how can daughter caregivers protect their father’s dignity and their own? What kind of tension might a daughter caregiver face support a father who may have been their role model for their whole lives? What can fathers and daughter caregivers do to deal with this tension and preserve their relationships? If you are asking yourself these questions, this article may have some answers.

Here are two points of view to depict the sensitive relationship between a senior father and his daughter, who provides his long-term care. Mark, a widowed father, suffered a stroke and just recently started needing long-term care. He lives at home alone, but his grown daughter Jessica temporarily moved in to ease his transition from the hospital. Jessica is married and has two children and a full-time job. They both place deep importance on Mark’s care but have started to realize the trouble that comes with it. Maybe you will be able to relate to how Mark and Jessica feel about family caregiving.

Mark

My daughter Jessica is the apple of my eye. She is smart, successful and loving, especially to her family. I see her enjoy her husband and kids every time they visit, and they all look at her like she lights the world. Right now, she’s the only light in my world. I am recovering from this stroke as best I can. But I wish I didn’t need so much help from Jessica. I have always been healthy and strong. I am proud to say I kept our family afloat through job layoffs, my wife’s cancer and more. My wife, God rest her soul, would be very proud of the woman Jessica has become, but probably saddened to see her working so hard.

I know Jessica traded things from her life to temporarily help me with mine. We’re so alike, stubborn and independent. This is hard for both of us. Jessica wakes me up every morning to eat a very nutritious meal (made by her), bathes, dresses me, and gets my entire day going. I’ve never really wanted this for her. I wouldn’t trust anyone else in the world with my life, but being this close never happened when I was healthy. I was the one changing her diapers, struggling with pantyhose, attempting to do her hair and driving her from school to softball practice when she was younger. My, how the roles have reversed.

I take it day by day and cherish Jessica for helping me. I will never lose the love I have for her, no matter how old I get. It’s hard for her to see me needing so much help, but I dedicate my progress to being strong enough to ease the burden off her shoulders. 

Jessica

If my dad ever tells me he’s fine on his own, I want to believe him. l want him to be that invincible guy who could do absolutely everything for anyone, including himself. I know he wants the same too. But while he needs help, we both have to accept a small sacrifice. We have to accept each other’s sacrifices too. I’m here to do anything it takes to make him healthy again. If that means my husband has to hold the fort on his own at home, that’s okay. Family is family. I am all Dad has left. 

It’s funny how much we both know about this situation. It’s tough. It’s hopefully temporary. We know that with my help, Dad will get better, and that will only help me. But the sacrifice I know Dad makes every day as he watches his only daughter become his lifeline is one of pride. We are both so independent. We want to do everything ourselves. I never saw him needing anyone else’s help when I was younger. He took care of everything on his own. It hurts us both to watch that go away. For now, I devote everything to that “someday” – the day when Dad can stand on his own feet with OR without me.

Mark and Jessica have a loving relationship strained by the service of caregiving. It affects Mark’s sense of self and identity as Jessica’s strong, independent father. He misses his former healthy self while wishing Jessica could be as independent as they both used to be. Jessica feels entirely devoted to Mark without complaint, but she feels tension in accepting how much they both sacrifice. She feels empathetic for her father, who she knows is going through a hard time physically and mentally.

Both Mark and Jessica are on the verge of accepting hard truths about family caregiving. If you are a family caregiver or a senior receiving care from family, it can help to keep the things below in mind:

• Caregiver burnout stresses family caregivers who have to juggle multiple responsibilities in addition to caregiving.
• Seniors receiving care can feel uncomfortable with family caregivers who cross into intimate boundaries.
• Family caregivers feel an extra sense of familial devotion that hired caregivers may lack.
• A family caregiver, if they are the only person available to help, may feel isolated and sad.
• Seniors who watch their family make sacrifices for their long-term care can feel guilty for occupying them.
• With a goal to improve health and hopes for better days, family caregivers will do anything for a senior they love.
• Children of seniors report strain in their own marriages when they have to care for their parent.

The first step to dealing with hard truths to swallow about family caregiving is acknowledging feelings and observations such as these. You cannot ignore how family caregiving affects you or your loved ones. Especially if family caregiving is taking an emotional toll on either the senior or the caregiver, you must realize the truth beneath the emotion.

Next, talking about these things, no matter what social or emotional obstacles you feel will break the ice above the healing you will reach. If you are a senior, let your caregiver know what you are comfortable with or not, and if something you do not like must happen for the sake of your health, tell your caregiver it is a sensitive issue. Caregivers should listen carefully to these things if a senior musters the courage to say them. They should also relay what they learn into action, showing tact and sensitivity to a senior’s needs in the way they communicate, behave, and convey meaning through body language.

“Family is family,” as Jessica says. But when a family is strained and suffers tension because of caregiving, having help can alleviate stress and drastically improve relationships. Delegate responsibilities to other loved ones, consult health professionals for instruction or commission a caregiver from a trusted agency. If you do not want caregiving to strain your family and know this before you actually need long-term care, plan and prepare your assets to cover care when you need it in the future.

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Prince Philip talking with Queen Elizabeth II at Windsor in May. He was involved in a car accident on Thursday, raising questions in Britain about when seniors should stop driving. Credit: Steve Parsons/Press Association, via Associated Press

Prince Philip, the 97-year-old husband of Queen Elizabeth II of Britain, overturned his Land Rover on Thursday in a car crash on a rural road north of London. He was unhurt; two women in an oncoming minivan suffered scrapes and a broken wrist.

It’s not known exactly what happened or who was at fault. The prince told police officers at the scene that he was momentarily blinded by the sun while pulling onto the main thoroughfare.

The incident has prompted some reflection in Britain about when an aging driver ought to consider surrendering the car keys. Sound familiar? The question has long tormented families everywhere.

Over the years, reporters at The Times have written extensively about the thorny issues involved. Here are a few articles about a controversy that won’t be going away anytime soon.

The Car Key Conversation

Now I learn that the “car key conversation” is the one that caregivers dread most. Thirty-six percent of adult children polled by the website Caring.com and the National Safety Council said that talking to their parents about the need to stop driving would be harder than discussing funeral plans (29 percent) or selling the family home (18 percent).

Should Doctors Stop Patients From Driving?

Alas, among the takeaways of the guidebook are the great difficulties physicians have at this fraught moment, and how much easier it would be for them if the decision did not involve them. As it is, physicians must wrestle with laws that vary by state on a variety of issues: if and how elderly drivers are assessed differently than younger ones; whether it is mandatory or optional for doctors to report their concerns; how they are supposed to go about it and strike the right balance between confidentiality and safety; and whether they risk legal liability if, on the one hand, they alert the state authorities or, on the other hand, they keep silent and a subsequent accident occurs.

Elderly Drivers Fail a Test

True or false? Most older drivers drive as safely as anyone else. It’s just that a few bad apples, particularly those behind the wheel despite poor vision or dementia, make mistakes and produce the statistics showing that per mile driven, drivers over age 75 are almost as dangerous as teenagers.

I want this to be true, given how dependent Americans of all ages are on automobiles. But researchers in Australia, using a novel method to gauge how well people drive, have concluded that serious errors are alarmingly commonplace. “We are seeing a ubiquitous increase in driver errors with age,” said Kaarin Anstey, a psychologist at Australian National University and lead author of the report, just published in the journal Neuropsychology.

My Solution to the Driving Problem: Vandalism

Sneaking into my mother’s garage to disable the engine of her 1997 Honda Accord was not something I ever imagined doing in my role as daughter and caregiver of a parent in failing health.

I had every possible legal authority to secure her health and safety, including medical and legal powers of attorney that enabled me to unravel paperwork problems, manage home repairs and participate in medical decisions. But messing with her right to drive, I discovered, was a huge, neon-lighted, statutory no-no in New York State.

A Contract to Stop Driving

I’m intrigued by the idea of a family driving agreement, by which an older person who may now be a perfectly fine driver acknowledges that with age-related changes, “there may come a day when the advantages of my continuing to drive are outweighed by the safety risk I pose not only to myself, but also to other motorists.”

With this document, the driver designates a trusted relative or friend to notify him when he should either stop driving or continue only with certain restrictions. He pledges to listen and accept that person’s recommendation. Then the driver, his designated adviser, and a witness, or several, affix their signatures.

Driving While Demented

Take the question of whether people with mild dementia — not just older drivers in general — should be behind the wheel at all. “Clinicians may present patients and their caregivers with the data showing that, as a group, patients with mild dementia … are at a substantially higher risk for unsafe driving, and thus should strongly consider discontinuing driving,” a new report suggested.

Yet it also noted that several studies had shown that a considerable number of those with mild dementia — 41 percent to 76 percent, depending on the study — could pass an on-road driving test. Given that, in many parts of the country, not being able to drive can lead to isolation and a host of other real problems, should those people have to give up their cars?

Safer Cars Help Keep Older Drivers on the Road

After years of advising others on how to get older drivers to relinquish the car keys, which often resulted in lost independence, isolation and depression (as well as family disputes), driving experts now focus on helping the elderly select vehicles that can accommodate their physical disabilities and certain sensory or cognitive losses.

An Alternative to Giving Up the Car Keys

While that is a scary thought for some people, the common perception, that the only real choice is between ignoring the difficulties faced by elderly drivers and taking away the car keys, is wrong. “We’re evolving in our thinking,” said Jodi Olshevski, a gerontologist and executive director of the Hartford insurance company’s Center for Mature Market Excellence. “We’re not just looking at the transition from driver to passenger, but how we can empower drivers to extend their driving as long as possible.”

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At the hospital the next day, the doctors tell Kathy and Sarah to say their last goodbyes to a mother who is suffering from traumatic brain injury and severe internal hemorrhaging. In tears, they struggle to believe that someone as lively as Margaret was could be gone so soon. One slip on a rug led to a fall down stairs and injuries that ended her life at 83. In the following years, the “what-ifs” run through their minds over and over. What if someone had been there with her? What if they had found her earlier? What if they had made sure the house was safe for her?

Preventing Falls

Falls are the most prevalent mobility problem, and the leading cause of injury death, for those over 65. Things like lack of physical activity, poor vision, and environmental factors – a loose rug or poor lighting – are all common causes of falls among the senior population. With increasing age, falls often result in broken bones that take longer to heal, as well as painful bruises. Even without the serious injury, an older person may have trouble getting up from a fall or may become fearful and inactive to avoid falling again. Mobility loss in seniors increases their chance of falling. The following is a list of sobering statistics about the millions of elderly falls that occur each year:

• One out of five falls causes a serious injury such as broken bones or a head injury.
• Each year, 2.5 million older people are treated in emergency departments for fall injuries.
• Over 700,000 patients a year are hospitalized because of a fall injury, most often because of a head injury or hip fracture.
• Each year at least 250,000 older people are hospitalized for hip fractures.
• More than 95% of hip fractures are caused by falling, usually by falling sideways.
• Falls are the most common cause of traumatic brain injuries (TBI).
• Adjusted for inflation, the direct medical costs for fall injuries are $34 billion annually. Hospital costs account for two-thirds of the total.

Source: Centers for Disease Control and Prevention 

Recognizing the red flags that signal mobility loss can protect you or your loved one from falls that may have devastating consequences.

Signs of Mobility Loss

Researchers at the University of Alabama at Birmingham discovered that the most common factors leading to mobility loss were old age, low physical activity, obesity, impaired strength and balance, and chronic disease. Depression, cognitive impairment, and recent hospitalizations also lead to a greater risk of mobility loss.

Suzanne Salamon, a geriatrician, and instructor at Harvard Medical School said that signs of mobility loss are often overlooked in seniors due to what seem to be more pressing health issues, like heart or lung problems. However, untreated mobility issues can lead to further health problems, and can ultimately determine whether a senior can continue living independently.

“If you’re unable to get out then you can’t go shopping, you can’t go out with your friends to eat dinner or go to the movies, and you become dependent on other people to get you places,” Salamon said. “So you become a recluse, you stay home, you get depressed. With immobilization comes incontinence, because you can’t get to the bathroom, you can develop urinary infections, skin infections. The list goes on.”

The good thing about testing mobility is that you don’t need a doctor to do so. 

Simply observe the senior getting up from a chair, walking about 10 feet away, turning around and returning to the chair and then sitting back down. The things to look for are how long it takes and how steady the senior is while doing it. You can also just observe how quickly a senior walk to see if there are any signs of mobility loss. A normal rate is traveling one yard per second or faster. Anything slower than that can mean gait problems and an increased risk of falls.

If you suspect mobility loss, researchers at the University of Alabama at Birmingham suggest asking two questions: Do you have difficulty climbing up 10 steps or walking a quarter of a mile? And, have you modified the way you climb 10 steps or walk a quarter of a mile because of health reasons? If you answered yes to either question, a doctor can help you find the cause of the problem and recommend treatment before a loss of mobility occurs. The good news is that, when caught and treated early, mobility loss can be avoided with different types of therapy. There are also many types of devices like walkers, canes, and wheelchairs that can improve mobility, which can significantly improve a senior’s life and well being.

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“Dear Mom…”

Jenny lifted her pen to look at the Mother’s Day card she was writing. There was a lot of blank space to fill under these words. Something about the empty card was intimidating. She had a lot to say to her mother, yet too few ways to say it. She was at a loss for words.

Jenny’s mother lived far away, in her home town of Raleigh, North Carolina. In Chicago, Jenny’s life revolved around her job and her husband. Though she was an only child, she always felt like her mother was more of a sister than a parent when she was younger. Her mom was just as independent, just as busy, stubborn and strong-willed as Jenny was.

She called her mother when she found the time. The last she heard, her mother was transitioning to an independent living facility, where some of her friends were already. Jenny felt like she hadn’t called enough, but she had been so focused on her own life – confident that her mother would always be okay at home.

Frustrated, Jenny decided to call before continuing her card. She dialed her old childhood home phone number, anticipating her mother’s familiar voice and almost jumped the gun to say, “Hi mom!” before an automated message beat her to it with the words, “This number is no longer active.”

Jenny hadn’t misdialed the number, but she realized she had misjudged the reality of her mom’s situation. Her mother had probably changed her life, moved away or worse – gotten into trouble, and Jenny didn’t know about it. She hadn’t stayed connected to her mother the way she should have.

Jobs and life events tend to separate adults from their parents, especially as the troubled job market leads them to take any job they can get. This can leave children far away from mom and dad, but it can also lead them to find creative ways to reach their parents.

Letters, packages, cards, and deliveries are valuable, tangible items you can send your parents remotely. Phone calls offer a little more intimacy, especially if you feel your parent needs to hear your voice. In addition, technology today allows us to reach parents through live video communication. Whichever medium of connection you choose to bond with your parents from afar, it can make the distance between you seem smaller.

If you are a long-distance caregiver, managing an aging parent’s care can get in the way of bonding if you take more of a “supervisor” or “babysitter” role over your mom or dad. Instead of hovering over your parents, actually, take the time to bond with them. This article will give you ideas on how to do that.

Ask…

• How are you? Mean it when you ask, listen and inquire further on their response.
• Who’s been keeping you company? Find out who your parents’ friends and caregivers are, then get to know how your parents feel about them.
• What has been making you happy lately?  Know where your parent sources their happiness. Just telling you about a person, TV show or hobby they enjoy can make your parent very happy.
• Did you catch that last game? Follow up on your parents’ interests, like sports games they watch, television shows they love or movies that have just come out. If you also share these interests, there is a lot for you both to talk about!
• Did you know… Let your parent know about family updates or other interesting things that affect either of your lives. Aging parents learn easily by word-of-mouth from people they trust.
• How was that last doctor’s appointment? Keep a rapport of your parent’s health care. Show that you are both concerned about and up-to-date with their wellbeing.
• What’s new with… Know what has already been going on in your parent’s life. Ask for updates about the things they have been doing.

Say…

• Family updates Tell your parent about your spouse, your children, or any other relatives that they may not talk to often. Keeping a parent in tune with the family makes them feel like part of a community.
• General news in both of your communities If you know of important or interesting news in your community or your parents’, talk about them. Maybe there is an important weather update or fun event to look out for.
• How have you been? Part of the joy of connecting with your parent is letting them know about your life. Talk about work, family, and how you feel about anything else in life. Your parent may be very interested in you.
• Why you called Sometimes, we feel an invisible nudge to reach out to our aging parents. They want to know why you call. They want to know why and how you care.
• Who else says hello If someone has told you to say hello to your parent for them, let your parent know. It is nice to know that someone thought of them.
• What life is like for you Let your parent live a bit vicariously through your adventures through life. Share life triumphs or battles with your parent.
• Interesting things you’ve learned When you learn something new about other people, technology, politics, celebrities, or anything else, share it! If it interested you, your parent will be interested in finding out why.
• Health updates If you have a hand in managing your parents’ health care, give them gentle reminders about upcoming appointments.

Send…

• Pictures You can bet on your parent saving every picture you send. Send a snapshot of your life to give them access to you from far away.
• News Clippings When a family member, friend, or beloved sports or celebrity figure is in the newspaper, send a clipping of it to your parent. You can also print out news from the web. If you know what news your parent will care about, they may want something tangible as a keepsake.
• Hobby Items If your parent has a hobby, send them material for it. Craft items, instruction manuals, magazines, or even samples of work encourage your parent to keep up with their hobby.
• Clothes Anyone can send their parent a new outfit. But if there is spirit wear for your child’s sports team or branded apparel from work that you can send them, they will wear it proudly as a representation of you.
• Souvenirs When you travel, don’t forget to find something small to send your parent. Just like you might buy souvenirs to remember a good time, your parent might want one to remember you.
• Work Samples When you are particularly proud of a piece of work, send a copy or review of it to your parent.
• Children’s Schoolwork Children from any grade level bring homework that they want to show off. After congratulating your child for their artwork, test grades, or essays, send them to your parents to include them in the celebration.
• Holiday Cards If you are unable to meet face-to-face for a holiday, send a card to show you care.
• Web Articles or Videos Online, it is easy to email or share content on social media. Share web articles or videos that interest you with your parent. The small gesture lets them know that you are thinking about them.

Learn…

• Your differences and similarities  As you and your parent ages, you may realize you are either more similar or different than you think. Learn characteristics that you share in common with your parent. Learn how they do things differently, and whether it’s good for you to adopt their strengths.
• Technology Technology typically advances faster than the elderly can learn it but taking the time to help your parent understand a smartphone, tablet or computer might make communication easier with them. Be patient when you introduce technology to your parent. It will pay off.
• New ways to communicate If there are barriers to break down while you maintain a close bond with your parents from afar, you will inevitably learn new ways to communicate. Already, the distance between you affects how you connect. But growing in adulthood and old age also teaches us how to relate, how to talk like adults and how to listen. Practice and build good, healthy communication with your parents to make the most of your close bond.

The post Maintaining Close Bonds with Parents from Afar appeared first on SYNERGY HomeCare of Villa Rica.

Okinawa prefecture is the southernmost prefecture, or state, in Japan. It consists of hundreds of the Ryukyu Islands in a chain over 620 miles long and claims the largest number of centenarians in the world. Centenarians, or people who have lived more than one hundred years, are living examples of successful aging. A study of Okinawan centenarians (known as the Okinawa Centenarian Study) revealed that they shared a diet that is low in calories, almost sugar-free and practically devoid of processed or canned food. Further studies of primitive cultures with high longevity showed their diets to be low in fat and devoid of animal fats, processed food, sugar, preservatives, artificial flavors, and other chemicals.

Diet is certainly not the only factor that contributes to healthy aging, but it seems to play a key role. Elderly Okinawans have among the lowest mortality rates in the world and have a history of aging slowly and delaying (or even escaping) chronic diseases such as Dementia, coronary heart disease, stroke, and cancer.

According to a recent study at Oregon Health and Science University (OHSU) in Portland, people in their late 80s with higher blood levels of B, C, D and E vitamins and omega-3 fatty acids (found in good fats) did better on cognitive tests and had less of the brain shrinkage typical of Alzheimer’s disease.

So what foods should you eat to boost these vitamins in the body?  A Mediterranean diet has been found to be beneficial; which includes vegetables (particularly leafy greens), fruits, small amounts of meat and fish, whole grains, nuts, and olive oil. Research shows that turmeric may help prevent the accumulation of plaques that build up in the brains of Alzheimer’s patients and can interfere with communication between neurons.

It is also good to remember that what one doesn’t eat is important. Artery-clogging trans fats should be off-limits. These may replace the good omega-3 fats in the brain cell membranes and are associated with systemic inflammation, cardiovascular disease and endothelial dysfunction – all processes that can have an impact on memory, brain structure and cognition.

A new study published in Neurology (the medical journal of the American Academy of Neurology) reveals that diabetes significantly increases the risk of developing Dementia. Type 2 diabetes, the most common form of the disease, has reached epidemic proportions in the US and is due primarily to obesity and inactivity. That said, it may be good to cut down on those sugary cookies and empty calories. Also, there is certainly no evidence to suggest that fruits and vegetables can do any harm.

If you can take control of your health with good nutrition and possibly prevent not only diabetes but also Dementia – why wouldn’t you?

In a nutshell; eat real, unprocessed food and you will feel better, have more energy and be feeding your brain. It’s fundamental.

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